Sunday, August 3, 2008

Bare with it

I don't talk much about Mercy and Grace on here. I made that mistake with a previous blog. But with would have been their 4th birthday coming up, I think about them a lot. We usually do a picnic and balloon release for them on the weekend that is closest to their birthdays, but this year, we will be at a wedding in Nashvegas instead. I guess we will just have to do it the following weekend.

I see 2 very close friends that have a 5 and 4 year old and I see the friends those two have become. I often have a hard time watching them and not wonder if, just if, Mercy and Grace would have been close to them too.

It is hard, for me, not to think of them in everyday life. It is hard for me not to correct people when they comment about G being my first born... but why fight it.

They have seem to become easy to forget about in most people's life, but mine I guess. I don't know what to say, but I know that I miss them. I know they are in a better place. I don't know why what happened, happened.. but it is really not for me to know. I also know that what I have in my life, being D and G, I adore and can't imagine giving up for the world.

But even in your life, as wonderful and you know it is, some people won't talk about death. Why is that? Am I missing something? Is it taboo? Why if I bring them up, do people shy away?

So I will say it now and not again until next year..

Happy Early Birthday's Mercy and Grace
We love you dearly, and we miss you tremendously.
And since I didn't have a chance here to sit you on my lap and tell you about Jesus, I hope he has you on his lap telling you about me.

3 comments:

Jessica said...

I think about you and your precious girls often...I'm sure nowhere near as often as you do, though. I think people don't want to talk about death because they don't know what to say without sounding trite. I don't know.

Happy Birthday to Mercy and Grace! I can't wait to meet you one day!

Christie said...

Just so you know, I certainly haven't forgotten about your little girls either. Especially after having a little one of my own, I often remember what you have gone through and can't begin to imagine the feelings you have had and will continue to have about your girls and about losing them so early on their precious little lives. And I am looking forward to meeting them someday as well.
-Christie

Emmilu said...

I have not forgotten your girls either... I actually told someone their story a few weeks ago. Happy Birthday Mercy and Grace... what beautiful names for two beautiful angels!